monster post

you know something is not right when i voluntarily associate myself with anything maths-related. on a normal day, as most of my friends know, the furthest i'm willing to venture into the wonderful world of numbers is to exclaim periodically "wah that's worth (insert sum in dollars divided by half here) plates of chicken rice!". but. what am i if not adaptable? keep unflattering adjectives to yourselves thankyu hahaha

i digress.

"life is like a sine graph; it's bound to have its ups and downs, but the main thing is to remember that what goes down must come up, and vice versa. keeping this in mind might help you keep things in perspective- once it starts to resemble a tangent graph (ed: refer to graph below) then you start worrying" - a very wise sage in mortal form

then i got curious; i won't even pretend that i remembered (or did i not even know in the first place?) how the sine and tangent graphs look like. i HEART the internet cuz it helps me get over my ignorance as quickly and painlessly as possible. then the graph looked so pretty, i regretted not paying closer attention during maths lessons in school. FAKE. haha


so. i'm sorry *half-hearted apology mode* for all the times i made fun of science kids; i suppose you're proof that not every single maths monster is all about 1 + 1. you actually took something so foreign to me and made it digestible; thankyu not only for the interesting imagery, but being sensitive enough to just somehow KNOW.

and to tell myself to give everyone a second chance, ling jie jie and i decided to give the kids some sort of a reward/assessment system. so primary school, i know, but sho pretty! say it's pretty! (the board la). print and cut and paste until can die; panicked until wana die when i realised i didn't have any more pink paper left, and that i had missed out two girls' names. it's a good thing i'm so smart HAHA

the basta... oops boys' names

pretty pretty girly font for the girls!

THE board

random-cam-whore-pic

and learned recently that there has been some reshuffling of relationships amongst people that i know- when does an "acquaintance" get promoted to "friend", and vice versa, anyway? and when does relationships with the opposite sex take precedence over friendships, and, yes, vice versa? what happens when you put some friendships in cold storage for your relationship, and that relationship dies? but of course, in the heady first days, who wouldn't think that the stars shine out of their other half's ass, huh. but when i first heard, it was kind of a bummer. honestly, even while my friendship sputtered, i had hoped that the relationship would last, because then, at least the friendship forfeited would have served a greater purpose.

i know this sounds really self-centred and all; he-llo, people are breaking up here, for goodness sake, and i'm whining about some wasted friendships that was mutually given up in the first place? then does that make me a poor excuse of a friend, or am i, in the words of too many friends (what irony), thinking and analysing too much? i expected friendships to get simpler as i grew older, since we're supposed to become more mature and all. but it seems that the older i get, the more i'm finding myself losing sleep over supposedly trivial matters that don't matter.

to me, it matters, you know? things that many people don't bother to overthink. knowledge that others prefer to remain ignorant to. feelings that take up too much space. thoughts that haunt me even when the lights go off, swimming in my head, suffocating me from within.

but it's ok that's just me; you don't have to know if you don't want to. tee hee.