it's 3a.m and i can't sleep. :( i hate it.
i was wondering how come the screen of the monitor seemed too bright.. then realised that it was bent too much forward. and this is the same idiot who unknowingly pressed the number lock on the keypad and suffered many, many days not only cutting and pasting the alphabets that did not work, but also worried shitloads in futile guilt that i've destroyed yet another piece of electronic equipment.
Speaking of which. i hate electronics. really, seriously hate that stuff. and i think this lack of fondness is mutual; they seem to just shrivel up and die in my possession. like committing suicide rather than suffer under my total ignorance and tyranny.
Me: Play this song now!
iPod: No! i'll die now hur hur
Me: *stomp stomp* i hate you!
my complete failure in handling electronics makes me worried about getting married next time and actually being responsible for a human life. omg. it's just too mind-boggling. although i'm not really sure how that's relevant.
BTW. almost as a testament to the continuing defiance of electronics directly or indirectly under my care, my aircon has recently decided to start dripping, which means that i have to worry about wanting to go pee in the middle of the night. all that dripping, y'know. i hate it. sometimes i dream of being some egyptian empress - hannypatra sounds good- with bronzed slaves cooling me gently to sleep with oversized fans made out of the most delicate material. and having foot messengers in place of sms and emails, so that they can kill the messenger on the other side if the news is not being well-received. and i wouldn't have to feel guilty about taking my own sweet time to start driving lessons, cuz then i'll have another set of bronzed slaves to carry me around in luxurious splendor.
cuz i think it's high time i learnt how to drive. i recently discovered that i hate taking public transport. a recent conversation:
Him: but it's pretty near your house leh think around 10 minutes by train
Me: huh but it's, like, 3 mrt stops away!
i'm not one of those girls who expect to be driven around everywhere; unless it's absolutely necessary, i'd rather stay at home and rot than go out if no transport is readily available, hence the hairs on my soles. may i defend myself here by stating that the busstop that goes to town is, like, a good 10 minutes' walk away from home? why should i walk 10 minutes to embark on a 3 minute bus ride to town? oh dear that sounded so wrong. i'm not spoilt, just lazy. ANYHOO.
i used to really enjoy being awake at this hour. cuz i remeber mr yeo used to tell us that when it's 2 - 3 a.m., you feel that the night truly belongs to you. cuz it's just you, your thoughts and maybe the internet, in my case. unless if you stay in hall, where being awake at 3 a.m. is as normal as people stealing your food from the fridge. but at home, it's all quiet. except for my stupid aircon. but it used to be so nice to be studying late into the night during the crazy cramming for the A' levels- something which turned out to be totally useless, since i later found out that people with totally shit grades ended up at the same place as i did. perhaps i should have convinced the father to send me elsewhere, like meghan did. flew off, out of this place she went, sniggering at me for being so foolish. good grades? what for? the minimum was more tahn enough. but i suppose if i really did go elsewhere, i wouldn't have met the people i did. i guess life is a constant question of opportunity cost- the cost of the opportunities you didn't quite seize. it's been so many years since i moved here; i'm getting restless already.
it's always the bland fence-hoggers that play it safe and keep themselves away from harm. but nothing ventured = nothing gained? i'm beginning to weigh the pros and cons of living life passionately, at the cost of offending people sometimes, versus the merits of living life as an Everyman. why struggle? you're but another one of the little people. nothing special. oh i don't know. to each their own, i suppose.
i have come to a conclusion that you can eat chilli with practically everything and anything salty. as mr wong can bear witness, this theory has been supported by years of careful research and tireless experiments by yours truly. porridge? sure. yu tiao? why not? and i saw on tv recently that this company in china makes chilli ice cream. so i say.. with a pure heart and determination, yes, you too can eat chilli with anything! (sounds like some communist propaganda) but i think my tastbuds are kinda spoilt. i can't really taste spiciness anymore. unless it's that super shiok sambal belachan at the pernakan restaurant at Stardus my mom took me to. it literally made me cry can!
i need to sleep....
