was looking through my cupboard and sorting out the clothes i wana bring to hall (although yes the hall closet is just fit to burst), and came across my old rugby singlets and jerseys.
it's been so long since i've played competitively, and i know i'm definitely far from being match-fit. and inter-class games are coming up. i know it's supposed to be this fun and friendly thing, but i can't help it if i feel stressed over it, can i? the smell of the grass as i bend down to tap the ball, my lungs bursting with agony and my calves begging for mercy. how stupid of me to realise that i hate the game only when i'm out on the field dying.
in my life, i've never felt that i was bad at sports per se, or even unathletic. no matter how little confidence i have in myself as a rugby player, at least i never felt useless in a game. but volleyball has proven to be my kryptonite. add basketball and soccer to that list as well. all these years playing with an almond-shaped ball and being lazy to practice other sports is going to contribute my spectacular fall from grace (not a very far way down, but STILL), i suspect. i mean, how bad is the situation when i can actually tell my classmates (lovely people, all) that the only way i can contribute to the vball game will be to do stupid things so that the opponents die laughing? le sigh.
i need to train more and practice harder; i was telling mr wong that the only time i feel sub-athletic is on tuesdays when i have my rugby module. and i seriously hate it. i don't care if i've never played vball in my life before; ditto for soccer and basketball. i really don't care.
and whining about it is not going to help, i guess. it's just ironic that what i like doing best is giving me stress, and what i thought i was reasonably good at is making me feel shite. c'mon c'mon!!
i bought a few pretty shirts and comfy adidas sports bras today *happy* if i'm going to make a fool out of myself, i might as well do it in style. yeeeha
