Schedule for the past 2 days of school has been surprisingly packed; yesterday, because i was so nice, and today, because i'm, once again, so nice. Been leaving my room at, like, 8 a.m and returning no earlier than 8p.m. GET HALL ROOM FOR WHAT.
Woke up late for my 8:30a.m lecture today.
At 8:35a.m, after frantically washing up and running back to my room to get dressed, i got a call from an unknown number.
Me: Impatiently Hello? Hello?
Unknown Male: Hello? Is this hannah?
Me: Irritated cuz i was rushing. like, REALLY rushing yes this is han na
UM:Where are you now?
Me: Getting more irritated I just woke up i'm still in hall
UM: Are you having lecture now?
Me: Super pissed yes i'm supposed to be at a lecture now but i just woke up la dammit who the hell is this?
UM: I'm your lecturer
LE FUCK.
you know the part in sta*r w*ars where dar*th vade*r tells luke "i am your father"? fuck times ten ok. when i ran into the tutorial room i wanted to kiss the hem of his trousers and beg him please please don't report me to H*Q. so now i'll have to get A+++++++++ for this module.
so that's my interesting story for today.
and kehui is not as scary as i thought she was; she's in my group for discussion for one of the modules, and she's nice. hee.
as i'm growing older, i'm learning. learning to love myself more, learning to give others a chance; i'm making new friends like nobody's business la how to remember everyone's names? so people have been reduced to 'that one that one' and 'the he lo the he'. but no matter how many new, good friends i make, it's the old friends that i hold dear to my heart. got enough space la my heart very big one. just for you.
sometimes things don't work out; i'm sorry to anyone or anything that's been adversely affected by me in any indirect or direct manner, i truly am. but sometimes, people, including myself, don't realise just how much i've been hurt as well. it's a two-way thing, y'know? sometimes i just sit down, or lie awake, thinking. yes la i mind-masturbate (i.e. mindfuck myself) damn loser i know. but sometimes when i look back at all the shite over the years, i realise that friends, rugby, and the survival instinct to just simply keep breathing and take one day at a time kept me alive. i'm too tired to keep thinking back, too jaded to feel depressed. some people get more shite than others, that's a fact. so how are you going to get over it?
but i'm not out to get sympathy; life's too short la seriously. it's a cliche i know but i'm already in my mid-twenties and i definitely don't want to get my panties in a twist over such stuff anymore. if it's karmic retribution for the negativities i've inflicted in this world, eh fuck you la i've had more than most people's share anyway. put things in perspective, please.
