Staying in hall is definitely not easy sometimes. Of course, I love it that my neighbours are perfect sweethearts, and that I really, seriously love my block. In my extremely biased point of view, I think D block is the best block; like a born-again Christian who tends to be much more rabid in his/her love for the religion, I, likewise, find myself feeling so much for this block. If E block was the first marriage that did not work out for some reason, then D block is the person I'm going to grow old with. C block? A wonderful, wonderful short fling. haha
Now, given this point of view, and I'm sure many seniors feel the same way too, we may tend to get a tad defensive when it comes under attack- you may claim that you are simply being vocal, and may even question why 'society' cannot accept vocality. Unfortunately, this is where the double-edged sword of living in such close quarters with roughly 99 other people in your block comes in. It is so ironic, is it not, when you are surrounded by people and yet sometimes you can feel so left out? But one has to, one MUST understand that it is always a two-way thing; you make the effort to appear and keep yourself active, and your blockmates will reciprocate the feeling. Now, are you being fair to the block committee, to your neighbours, to the people you call your blockmates? If an ostritch chooses to bury its head in the sand. only to emerge once in a while for a breath of air, then should it blame its keeper, its partner, when it suffocates to death?
I call it immaturity.
There exists a profound difference between being vocal and simply tactless. But as a senior whose 4 years in KR flew by too quickly, allow me to dispense some advice. Firstly, if one does not know what is going on in the block, despite constant emails and reminders from the block committee, then one should make it one's business to find out. Secondly, I'd strongly suggest that one should consult a more active member of the block about events within the block, instead of somebody whom the others rarely see. That is similiar to asking the blind for directions. Unless you are Daredevil.. Thirdly. People are constantly judging in hall, like it or not. Get over it, or get out, for your own sake. Just as we judge others, we are being judged as well. If one is intelligent enough to enter this shithole, it is truly a pity if one does not even realise that certain actions will cause more of a reaction than others, especially in such close living quarters as in hall. Welcome to the life of a hostelite.
Nothing is ever a 'tainted issue'- perhaps the realisation that the simple act of non-rebuttal and retaliation is a form of forgiveness in itself will dawn eventually.
When I was a freshman, I was in total awe of my seniors- from A block all the way to E block, I respected them - and still do- for being all that they were. I was first and foremost impressed with the way they loved KR from the bottom of their hearts, with the way they were hostelites first, and NUS students second. As I went on to the second year, I was disillusioned, yes. I wondered why the seniors sometimes acted the way that they did, I wondered why I felt as if I was being judged in some way or other.
But when I left in the first semester of my third year, I learnt why. I understood why people are so passionate about KR. I understood why, as a Kent Ridgean, I could not even visit friends in KR without a pang in my heart. And when I came back in the second semester, to a new block, I admit that it was no easy adjustment to make. But.
It started with night cycling. I was pleasantly surprised at the friendliness of the D blockers; if I had not gone for night cycling, I doubt I'd have felt a part of the block as much as I do now. A sincere, heartfelt thank you to all those who went last year and made me feel so welcome.
One may wonder why I'm so defensive about D block. And I wonder too- honestly, when I learnt that there won't be any E block final years doing command this year, my heart secretly sank. And even as I want to think that I've assimilated to D block, when I think of the memorable year I had as a first year, I feel like a 'traitor', like how Jo Lene so eloquently put it. So please. No more 'go back to E block la' jokes.
In a few more months, I'll be graduating; then it's goodbye to NUS, goodbye to KR. A place I inadvertently refer to as home- 'I'll be going back to my house, then coming back home on Sunday night'. And even as I regret not being so much more in KR, I'm determined to give it back as much as I'm capable of repaying. I may not have been a blockhead. I may not have been a committee chair. I may not have been in the JCRC. But at the end of the day, when I do eventually leave KR, I hope I don't cry too much.
